A frog can’t empty its stomach by vomiting.
• A rat can go without water longer than a camel can.
• The lung fish can live out of water for three years in a state of suspended animation.
• The bark of an older red wood tree is fire proof.
• The average American consumes nine pounds of food additives every year.
• 7000 new insects species are discovered every year.
• The average human body contains enough fat to make seven bars of soap
• Barbie’s fill name is babra Millicent Roberts.
• Tug of war an Olympic event between 1900 and 1920.
• Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like its kissing the conveyor belt.
• An Ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
• The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.
• Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.
• If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have$1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without beingable to make change for a dollar.
• The only two days of the year in which there are no professionalsports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the dayafter the Major League All-Star Game.
• If you put a raisin in a glass of champagne, it will keep floating to the top and sinking to the bottom.
• The fingerprints of Koala Bears are virtually indistinguishablefrom those of humans, so much so that they could be confused at a crimescene.
• The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in everyfive must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstripsin times of war or other emergencies.
• Pearls melt in vinegar
More @ http://eamazings.com/index.php/knowledge-base/
Thursday, July 31, 2008
New Corporate Policies
SICKNESS AND RELATED LEAVE:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
SURGERY:
Operations are now banned. As long as you are an employee here, you need all your organs. You should not consider removing anything. We hired you intact. To have something removed constitutes a breach of employment.
BEREAVEMENT LEAVE:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or coworkers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements. In rare cases, where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early, provided your share of the work is enough to keep the job going in your absence.
YOUR OWN DEATH:
This will be accepted as an excuse. However, we require at least two weeks notice as it is your duty to train your replacement.
REST ROOM USE:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the rest room. In the future, we will follow the practice of going in alphabetical order. For instance, those whose names begin with 'A' will go from 8:00 to 8:10, employees whose names being with 'B' will go from 8:10 to 8:20 and so on. If you're unable to go at your time, it will be necessary to wait until the next day when your time comes again. In extreme emergencies employees may swap their time with a coworker. Both employees' supervisors in writing must approve this exchange. In addition, there is now a strict 3-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm bell will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, and the stall door open.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. All questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation's, or input should be directed elsewhere.
Have a nice week!!!
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
SURGERY:
Operations are now banned. As long as you are an employee here, you need all your organs. You should not consider removing anything. We hired you intact. To have something removed constitutes a breach of employment.
BEREAVEMENT LEAVE:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or coworkers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements. In rare cases, where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early, provided your share of the work is enough to keep the job going in your absence.
YOUR OWN DEATH:
This will be accepted as an excuse. However, we require at least two weeks notice as it is your duty to train your replacement.
REST ROOM USE:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the rest room. In the future, we will follow the practice of going in alphabetical order. For instance, those whose names begin with 'A' will go from 8:00 to 8:10, employees whose names being with 'B' will go from 8:10 to 8:20 and so on. If you're unable to go at your time, it will be necessary to wait until the next day when your time comes again. In extreme emergencies employees may swap their time with a coworker. Both employees' supervisors in writing must approve this exchange. In addition, there is now a strict 3-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm bell will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, and the stall door open.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. All questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation's, or input should be directed elsewhere.
Have a nice week!!!
Searching ME
The boss of a big company who needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers, dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper, "Hello."
"Is your daddy home" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him"
The child whispered, "No."
Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your mommy there"
"Yes."
"May I talk with her"
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman"
"No, he's busy," whispered the child.
"Busy doing what"
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise"
"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there" asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."
Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for" Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "ME"
"Is your daddy home" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him"
The child whispered, "No."
Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your mommy there"
"Yes."
"May I talk with her"
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman"
"No, he's busy," whispered the child.
"Busy doing what"
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise"
"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there" asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."
Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for" Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "ME"
See if you imagine such answers -
A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked, "Eddy what is your problem" Eddy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third -grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"
The teacher had had enough.
She took Eddy to the principal's office.
While Eddy waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.
The principal told the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.
The teacher agreed.
Eddy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3"
Eddy: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6"
Eddy: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know.
The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think Eddy can go to the third-grade."
The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions"
The principal and Eddy both agree.
The teacher asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of"
Eddy, after a moment, "Legs."
Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have"
The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!
Eddy replied, "Pockets."
Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into"
Eddy: "Pants"
Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid
Eddy: Coconut
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,
Eddy was taking charge.
Teacher: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky
Eddy: Bubblegum
Teacher: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.
Eddy: Shake hands
Teacher: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay
Eddy: Yep.
Teacher: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.
Eddy: Tent
Teacher: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.
Principal was looking restless and bit tense.
Eddy: Wedding Ring
Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
Eddy: Nose
Teacher: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Eddy: Arrow
Teacher: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of excitement
Eddy: Firetruck
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Eddy in the fifth-grade, I missed the last ten questions myself."
The teacher asked, "Eddy what is your problem" Eddy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third -grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"
The teacher had had enough.
She took Eddy to the principal's office.
While Eddy waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.
The principal told the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.
The teacher agreed.
Eddy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3"
Eddy: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6"
Eddy: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know.
The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think Eddy can go to the third-grade."
The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions"
The principal and Eddy both agree.
The teacher asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of"
Eddy, after a moment, "Legs."
Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have"
The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!
Eddy replied, "Pockets."
Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into"
Eddy: "Pants"
Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid
Eddy: Coconut
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,
Eddy was taking charge.
Teacher: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky
Eddy: Bubblegum
Teacher: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.
Eddy: Shake hands
Teacher: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay
Eddy: Yep.
Teacher: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.
Eddy: Tent
Teacher: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.
Principal was looking restless and bit tense.
Eddy: Wedding Ring
Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
Eddy: Nose
Teacher: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Eddy: Arrow
Teacher: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of excitement
Eddy: Firetruck
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Eddy in the fifth-grade, I missed the last ten questions myself."
How to kill your mother in law
You have two options
==========
#1
A long time ago in China , a girl named Li-Li got married & went to live with her husband and mother-in-law. In a very short time, Li-Li found that she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law at all.
Their personalities were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many of her mother-in-law's habits. In addition, she criticized Li-Li constantly.
Days passed, and weeks passed. Li-Li and her mother-in-law never stopped arguing and fighting.
But what made the situation even worse was that, according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband! d great distress.
Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-! law's bad temper and dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it! Li-Li went to see her father's good friend, Mr. Huang, who sold herbs.
She told him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so that she could solve the problem once and for all.
Mr. Huang thought for awhile, and finally said, "Li-Li, I will help you solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you."
Li-Li said, "Yes, Mr. Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do."Mr. Huang went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a package of herbs. He told Li-Li, "You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of your mother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly build up poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put a little of these herbs in her serving.
Now, in order to make sure that nobody suspect you, when she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly towards her. "Don't argue with her, obey her every wish, and treat her like a queen." Li-Li was so happy.
She thanked Mr. Huang and hurried home to start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law.
Weeks went by, and months went by, and every other day, Li-Li served the specially treated food to her mother-in-law. She remembered what Mr. Huang had said about avoiding suspicion, so she controlled her temper!r, obeyed her mother-in-law, and treated her like her own mother.
After six months had passed, the whole household had changed. Li-Li had practiced controlling her temper so much that she found that she almost never got mad or upset. She hadn't had an argument with her mother-in-law in six months because she now seemed much kinder and easier to get along with.
The mother-in-law's attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to love Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives that Li-Li was the best daughter-in- law one could ever find. Li-Li and her mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real mother and daughter.
Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening. One day, Li-Li came to see Mr. Huang and asked for his help again She said, "Dear Mr. Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my mother-in-law. She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her."
Mr. Huang smiled and nodded his head. "Li-Li, there's nothing to worry about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I gave you were vitamins to improve her health. The only poison was in your mind and your attitude toward her, but that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to her."
HAVE YOU REALIZED that how you treat others is exactly how they will treat you? There is a wise Chinese saying: "The person who loves others will also be loved in return." God might be trying to work in another person's life through you. Send this to your friends and spread the POWER OF LOVE.
===============
# 2
Choice is clearly YOURS
You have two options
==========
#1
A long time ago in China , a girl named Li-Li got married & went to live with her husband and mother-in-law. In a very short time, Li-Li found that she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law at all.
Their personalities were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many of her mother-in-law's habits. In addition, she criticized Li-Li constantly.
Days passed, and weeks passed. Li-Li and her mother-in-law never stopped arguing and fighting.
But what made the situation even worse was that, according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband! d great distress.
Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-! law's bad temper and dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it! Li-Li went to see her father's good friend, Mr. Huang, who sold herbs.
She told him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so that she could solve the problem once and for all.
Mr. Huang thought for awhile, and finally said, "Li-Li, I will help you solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you."
Li-Li said, "Yes, Mr. Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do."Mr. Huang went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a package of herbs. He told Li-Li, "You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of your mother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly build up poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put a little of these herbs in her serving.
Now, in order to make sure that nobody suspect you, when she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly towards her. "Don't argue with her, obey her every wish, and treat her like a queen." Li-Li was so happy.
She thanked Mr. Huang and hurried home to start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law.
Weeks went by, and months went by, and every other day, Li-Li served the specially treated food to her mother-in-law. She remembered what Mr. Huang had said about avoiding suspicion, so she controlled her temper!r, obeyed her mother-in-law, and treated her like her own mother.
After six months had passed, the whole household had changed. Li-Li had practiced controlling her temper so much that she found that she almost never got mad or upset. She hadn't had an argument with her mother-in-law in six months because she now seemed much kinder and easier to get along with.
The mother-in-law's attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to love Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives that Li-Li was the best daughter-in- law one could ever find. Li-Li and her mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real mother and daughter.
Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening. One day, Li-Li came to see Mr. Huang and asked for his help again She said, "Dear Mr. Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my mother-in-law. She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her."
Mr. Huang smiled and nodded his head. "Li-Li, there's nothing to worry about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I gave you were vitamins to improve her health. The only poison was in your mind and your attitude toward her, but that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to her."
HAVE YOU REALIZED that how you treat others is exactly how they will treat you? There is a wise Chinese saying: "The person who loves others will also be loved in return." God might be trying to work in another person's life through you. Send this to your friends and spread the POWER OF LOVE.
===============
# 2
Choice is clearly YOURS
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